The Fablieaux

The newest story line on Discovery Channel’s series “American Chopper” involves “Paul Teutel, Sr.” taking a troubled youth in as a mentor. Paul, Sr. feels that he can extend the same brand of understanding parenting to those unfortunate children and young adults that he has extended to his own sons on “American Chopper”.

National Troubled Youth Director Kevin Whelsley told The Fablieux “Many people, hundreds in fact, have called and emailed me personally wondering if I had actually seen the TV show. I can assure them that yes, I have.” When asked whether Discovery Networks would carry personal insurance for the volunteered youths on their rider, Whelsley responded “Of course. We’re not cruel. We would never put a youth directly into harm’s way without proper insurance.”

American Chopper spokesperson Anne Turner assured The Fablieaux that “While it is true that we are scaring only one youth “straight”, both organizations hope that the viewership the show commands will permit parents and parole officers alike to use the situation to their advantage.”

When asked to clarify, Turner explained “Our counselors, along with the youth’s parents, can now threaten to put a child into the Teutul’s care, and they will take us seriously. No more idle threats.” She beamed, “They know it can actually happen”. “Paul has ssureed me that he will try his hardest not to ‘punch the youth in the face’”, Turner concluded, apparently making reference to one of the many catch phrases Paul uses on the show to mentor, guide and nurture his sons.

The principal of a Utah middle school has been asked to apologize for forcing a kilt-wearing student to change his clothes-to less.

Weber School District spokesman Nathan Taggart says Kevin Jessop has been asked to extend an apology to 14-year-old student Gavin McFarland of Hooper after the school official’s comments Wednesday.

Gavin says he wore the kilt twice in the past two weeks to Rocky Mountain Junior High as a prop for an art project. Jessop told the boy that the outfit could be misconstrued as cross-dressing, and that to make things clearer he should remove his underpants.

Taggart says the district recognizes the kilt as an expression of the boy’s Scottish heritage and that the kilt was not inappropriate unless worn in the traditional fashion-commando (without undergarments).

Activists at NAMBLA have called the move by the school district a “…removal of one more barrier, bringing men one step closer to each other.”

Kilts are traditional Scottish apparel generally worn by men for formal or special occasions.